Pride and glory

Or is it pride and prejudice? I can't really remember. As far as I'm concerned it's pride, as in GAY PRIDE yay! And glory, for the glorious subsequent night, of which I dare not speak. Anyways. Pride weekend and its traditional wackfest, err I mean parade, is the event every decent member of this proudly deviant community is eagerly waiting for. All year long. Since it's fucking hetero-pride on the 364 remaining days... So "La Marche des Fiertés" was awesome: some 700,000 oddly dressed (or undressed) people gathered in downtown Paris (yeah, now you know where I live) to celebrate their gayness. They mourn it the rest of the time, that goes without saying.

From what I gathered, there are a few underlying goals in organizing the said event. First, it's the best excuse anyone has ever come up with to party in the day time, get drunk on the streets without getting arrested, thus pissing off all the uptight, hardworking neighbors, while listening to the shittiest dance music alive. And not feeling guilty about it. Here's proof :
Then, totally paralyzing half of the city is a way of getting back at all those pain-in-the-ass taxi drivers who keep on striking (either because of sky-rocketing gas prices, or just because truck drivers are doing it). Proof again :
Last but not least, pride is passive-agressive resistance against consumerism. Start off by getting all those go-for-nothing passersby attention, through the means of colorful, loud and really really slow floats. Then, coyly using various ridiculous outfits, prevent all those assholes from spending money they don't have, on obnoxious and abusive sales. Water proof :
Now maybe I completely misinterpret the whole thing...Wouldn't be the first time. I love it nonetheless. There are however a few things I seem understand properly, sometimes. Like for instance, pretty young girl body language at a party. Or maybe that was just the various illicit substances talking. Whatever.

Pride rocks ! Dykes, fags, trannies and other lovely whatchamacallit, be proud ! The damn thing was fun, and I can't wait for next year. Is it pride day yet? (Photo credits: Stéphane Popingays Martin !)

Gender Bender

That's my good friend T. That's him, right there, hiding behind my hand. I subtly camouflaged his identity for fear of retribution. But take my word for it, it's REALLY subtle. So T. tells me he's been, on occasions, called a "gender-bender", on account of his rather androgynous features and thin, Don-Diego-De-La-Vega-like moustache. Gender bender? Really??

That little head of mine starts processing. If he's a guy (or so I've been told), and has a moustache (he must be getting double male points for it), why does his being slightly built induce gender bending ? Seriously, do we need anymore labels? I'm sick of hearing names like butch, femme, metro-sexual or guinea pig being thrown around, like flying saucers in a galactic war. I don't understand the need for labelling people and I certainly don't recognize myself in any of them fancy names.
Not "stone cold butch", like this one :
What... Tattoos, piercing, smokes, key chain. Butch ! Anyways.
Also very much not "pillow queen" like her...

And certainly not looking "very-Shane-today" !None of the above. So what am I? What does that make me huh? Think. Moustache. Click. No moustache. Click. More brain processing. Wait. What? Eureka ! I can't file my own bad self right now, but let me force gender and sexuality labels (and sticky ones too) into an equation for you (what? Yes, I like maths...). Here it goes :

moustache = guy
no moustache = girl
so
boy - moustache = sissy
and
girl + moustache = hairy dyke

But here's the best part. If you add the 2 together, you get:
guy + girl = moustache + no moustache

so if I count correctly:
guy + girl = 0

Incredible. Amazing, I know! I have just demonstrated, in a most scientific manner, the universal paradigm that guy + girl = 0 !
In other words: straight = zero,
In other words: not straight = not zero
In other words: be gay, suckers !
Sorry. That's what labels do to me. Screw you, labels.

Girl Fix

Enough with the drooling.

Just a little warm-up round, to get an easy start on this new little thingy of a blog. I figured I could never go wrong with a slice of a lovely lady. So, my girl fix of the day is a straight up shot of the insanely hot Cathy DeBuono. Let's just say that the way she wears a leather vest got me really inspired (wink-name of this blog-wink)
Like the energy drink, she gives me wings...

I first came across Miss DeBuono on the ever-growing, ever-powerful AfterEllen site, where she too briefly filled the therapist/actress/grown-up hottie spot. In her vlog ("What's your problem?"), she answered reader's questions as a therapist, digressed happily with guests as a talk-show host and drank wine as a anyone should. WYP should, from now on, be featured on The Smoking Coctail.
I personnaly don't care where it's hosted, as long as I get my weekly session with Cathy (even if it's not free of charge). The lady is obviously smart (hello masters degree?! i.e. more than one active braincell), clearly funny (any of her vlogs will do the trick) and just painfully hot. See for yourselves below, or check out ANY PICTURE from the oh-so-appropriately dubbed "Dirty Cathy" series, by Kerry Krenzin).

Who needs anti perspirant anyway...

For real? I think I need new tires...

See? Funny. Sassy. Perfect. Quite simply, she's MY HERO.
I think I need a shower now.